I didn't realize how much it is possible to forget in two years. As I've had other experiences, become preoccupied with my career and med school and everything else that life rolls over me, I didn't realize that my idea of India had become more and more of an abstraction, more and more just bits of random snapshots that would enter my head and then leave fleetingly, without a chance to convey the detail and the emotion I feel when I'm here. They say memories "come flooding back", and it's funny, that's just how it feels, like after years of staying out of the pool you dive back in, and everything tastes and feels exactly how you remembered it, and you realize how much of the detail you forgot while you were dry.

The first thing I forgot was the smell. It's different every time I inhale, one breath full of spice and the next something more unpleasant, like faint urine or sweat. I forgot how the humidity sticks to your face, leaving a layer that never quite goes away, or how the wind slaps the little pieces of hair against your forehead when you are in a car, sticking to the layer of sweat and stinging ever so slightly. I forgot how you can instantly tell the caste or social standing of someone on the side of the road, how there are dozens of worlds living in the same place simultaneously that only mingle in the most formal of ways. I forgot how exhilarating and scary it is to be driving in a car that swerves in and out of lanes, a car that uses the horn as a traffic lane instead of a last resort.

I realize that going to a place like this once is not enough- it's too easy to forget. I'm glad I'm here again, a seasoned traveler this time, aware enough to know I'm getting ripped off at every turn but powerless to do anything against it. Kenji and I (it was so nice to see him, by the way), had to pay 300 Rs. for breakfast, because the hotel conveniently forgot to tell us that breakfast was free for 1 person, but for a double both people had to pay for meals. In some ways I don't mind paying the high prices, but in some ways it angers me that even though I lived here, I still don't know how much things should cost, and everyone still assumes that they can rip me off (and they can!)

I'll post more later- Kenji and I are going to spend the day in Bombay :)